Stars

when i was a little girl i was afraid of the dark.

{who am i kidding i still sleep with a hall light on.

 i could tell you i do because of my children but that would be a lie.}

my mom decided to take my brother and i for walks after dark through our neighborhood. one evening in late spring during our walk we had a conversation about what was out there in the dark "look up kelly what do you see?" my mom said

"i see stars momma" i replied

"what do you hear?"

i remember listening really hard to get past the sound of the bustling street that ran behind our house

"i hear frogs momma."

"what do you smell?" 

it was late spring and the evening was warm, i took a deep breath in and the smell of star jasmine swallowed me whole,  

"i smell flowers momma."

"is there anything scary out here in the dark?"

"no momma, just the stars and frogs and flowers."

"do you think the stars and and frogs and flowers are scared to be out here in the dark?"

i thought about it and quickly responded, "yes, momma it's dark." 

"did God make the dark kelly?"

that was easy "yes." i murmured 

"do you think God wants you to be scared?" 

"no" i answered feeling a little ashamed

"no he doesn't, God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and of a sound mind."

          ~2 timothy 1:7~

after that walk we began to say the verse together every night when she came in to kiss me good night. 

one evening after we said my verse she asked me, "what do you want for your birthday kelly?'

after thinking long and hard i answered "i want a star momma."

she smiled.

I don't know why this memory stands out so much for me. i was 3 or 4 at the most, but ever since each time i look up in the sky and see the stars i am enamored by the vast beauty.

Source: thegirlwhokeepsdreaming.tumblr.com via Kelly on Pinterest