Thankful

lately i have been in a state of thankfulness... 
thankful for God's love, mercy, and grace.


my husband and i have been through so much over our 12+ years of marriage. we've been on the top of the world one minute and in a deep dark hole the next. ( i filled for divorce once ) i had my reasons... they. were. valid. 
GOD got us through.

we have loved and lost. we have our two beautiful miracle babies who aren't really babies. they are 10 & 12. but, they'll always be MY babies. get over it guys. you are my babies. hee-hee.

yes this is old but they are so cute!

we've lost family members, and babies. we had 4 second trimester miscarriages and i know some will argue that a baby in utero is not exactly a baby it's a fetus, because it couldn't survive on its own, blah blah blah whatever. but all you momma's know once you find out your are expecting it is your bebe and you begin to dream and make plans. the dr. still don't know what caused the miscarriages, but they sure have theories. i've been poked and prodded more than i'd like to admit.




in 2008 my husband was in a head on collision while working. the car was demolished but, he walked away with only scratches and bruises. however an ultrasound showed that his spleen was bruised and enlarged almost to the point of rupturing. it didn't rupture. it did however take forever his spleen and surrounding lymph nodes to return to a somewhat normal size. so in the mean time ( 18 long months ) he was sent to an oncologist & had pet scans every three months and blood test after blood test. the dr. couldn't figure out why his spleen and lymph nodes were acting funny. they were testing him for leukemia because to them it's the only thing that made sense. i knew he was fine. his spleen and lymph nodes just freaked out from the accident. HELLO! i know i should go to medical school! haha. 


i recently went for my annual gyn visit and i was informed that i have a fibroid tumor in my uterus. WHAT i have a tumor... it's fine a fibroid tumor is basically scar tissue that bunches together. the best way to remove it is to have a partial hysterectomy. which would be fine but, i have a blood clotting disorder and my estrogen already bottoms out on a regular basis, and i'm only 30. whatev, again i'm giving it to god. 


which brings me to my point. how awesome is it that we don't have to worry in fact it hurts god's feeling when we worry because when we do worry it a sign of distrust in the LORD. as if little tiny humans could really change anything by worrying PFT!  


so ya i'm thankful for gods love mercy and grace. trust in him and he will see you through.
  i really can't stress it enough trust in him, & keep him in the center of all things in your life. 

psalm 55:22
cast your burden on the LORD, 
and HE will sustain you;
HE shall never permit the
righteous to be moved.

1 peter 5:6-7
therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of god,
that HE may exalt you in due time,
cast all you cares upon HIM, for HE cares for you.


have a wonderful weekend friends. i'll be moving & i can't wait to show you my "new" home. and seriously remember to be thankful for god's great love for us, his mercy and grace.


i am linking up with casey for on your heart.

happy weekend

xxO